Pitchers and Beer
One night, after a discouraging game, Scott Baker was sitting in the locker room looking dejected. 
"What's wrong, Scotty?" asked Johan and Carlos. 
"Well," he said, "I pitched a really great game tonight. I've been working so hard. I just feel a little bit like crying."
Along came Matt Garza. 
"Hey man," he exclaimed. "I feel your pain. My ERA is still at zero and I lost a game."
Then in walked Boof. 
"Hey, guys! I know we lost tonight and all, but you need to cheer up."
"Cheer up?" They all exlaimed at once. "Why should we?"
Boof explained. "Don't you think you should feel proud of your achievements? Everyone knows that wins and losses are the most meaningless stats for a pitcher. You've all done great, better than anyone gave you credit for. Well, except you, Johan."
"Hey!" Johan said.
"What I mean is, everyone knew you'd be great. Nobody ever worries about you," Boof said.
"Ok, I guess I know what you mean," Johan said. "But I still wish we could get more run support."
"What about me?" Asked Carlos. "Nobody thought I'd amount to anything this season, and I pitched a 9 inning shutout! Heck, everyone thought I should get the boot after spring training."
"Don't worry, Carlos, you've been fantastic too," said Boof. Say, I have an idea, guys!"
"Do we get to ask our offense why they can't get hits when there are runners in scoring position? Can we take each one of them aside and threaten them a little?" Matt wondered.
"No, no, no!" Boof said. "They feel lousy right now too. No point in making them feel worse."
"What's your idea then, Boof?" Scotty asked.
"I think we should all go over to Hard Rock Cafe and share a pitcher of beer. A nice frosty one always makes me feel a little better."
They all pondered that for a minute. "Great idea!" Matty said. "But we need a designated driver."
"I'll do it," said Scotty. "I still feel a little queasy after the loss. Besides, I don't have my ID on me, and I always get carded."
"Should we invite the bullpen?" Johan asked.
"No," said Boof. "I hear that Pat gets a little too silly when he has a few. Besides, I don't have room for the
whole pitching staff in my Suburban. Let's go."
So off went the pitching staff to forget their woes for a few hours. They drank beer, ate nachos, listened to music, and had a grand time at Hard Rock Cafe.
"Tomorrow is a new day," said Boof, "and things will only get better for us."
They all lifted their glasses and clinked them together.
